the life of a textbook.

My life is filled with textbooks.
Every waking moment, is filled with module related reading.

From Human Resource Management, to Leadership and management and Distribution Channel.
It came to a point where HRM and LM seem to be overlapping. - Everything became a blur, to a point where looking at any textbook, sort of gave me a dejavu feeling, where just looking at the title of the paragraph, i am absolutely able to predict how the points would be elaborated. The content of both textbooks are similar, sprouting the exact same points. Gahhh everything is driving me nuts, nuts, nut!

With such short time to study, frustration occurs when i push myself to hit my personal unrealistic target. Frustrations are often met with little unrealistic mental holidays where i envision myself, in some other parts of the world, doing something random and extreme - like bungee jumping or bullying sharks somewhere. Anything, but opening my eyes to look at my black and white copy of cheap textbook.

I cannot wait to get my ass to Bali, and it had better be worth the wait.

On a lighter note, i have been comforting myself, by buying a whole load of clothes online. Bad news is, i haven't got any chance to wear them around. It is such waste, to keep them hanging around in the wardrobe.

Oh well, looking pretty would have to wait. I am looking like a panda.
and panda needs sleep now.

zzzZZzz.

Territorial

Territorial.
After 24 years, I have finally found the word to describe my annoyance towards certain "trivial" situations, that enrages me.
Da calls it Territorial. Hah!

I was just sharing with her how annoyed, or rather how trivial situations like these, never fails to bring out the snappier, angrier side of me.

You must be wondering what exactly am I driving at, but hands up for those who have been in various situations that left you enraged, crying out "foul!", that left you pissed for as long as it takes, until you managed to share your territorial woes with like minded friends?

Scenario one.
You bought a skirt, at an incredibly cheap price.
Your buddies comments how pretty it is.

The next day, while you were out shopping with them, they saw the exact same skirt at a different price, and they each bought the exact skirt, right under your nose, without checking if it was alright with you.


Scenario two.
You brought your buddies to an "exclusive" place, having in mind that all good things should be shared with good friends of yours. Little did you know that the exclusivity was highly publicised by your friends ( probably because your friends thought that all good things should also be shared with their other friends), and the place soon lost its exclusivity.


Firstly, there is absolutely nothing morally wrong with both the situations.
In scenario one, you cannot stop anyone from getting the same skirt as you.

Not that auntie you see around your neighbourhood HDB market,
or that fat blubber whom just scrolled across the street in orchard,
nor the tranny that just happened to be flouncing around in it,
or even the store owner who brought in hundreds of that same skirt to sell.

So why the sheer cry of outrage, when your friends choose to buy the exact skirt, right under your nose, without checking if it was alright with you?

Let me lead you into the psychological make up of Daphne's Territorial view.

Technically speaking, in my snob opinion, when i purchase ANYTHING, i expect it to have a certain amount exclusivity to it, which is one of the reasons why some people are willing to pay thousands of dollars, just to lay their hands on limited edition items.

If i purchase the item FIRST, the least my immediate group of "friends" could do, is to respect the fact that the skirt was first spotted and worn by me, and not habour thoughts to owning it as well.

However, IF you really, really need to buy the exact same thing, respect me, by checking if i am fine with it, before doing it.

Afterall, figurative speaking, if you need a favor from my boyfriend, it is only polite to tell me about it, before asking my boyfriend, instead of disregarding my presence, and call him up directly, do you? Well, at least i am appalled by it.
-

While in scenario two, a benefit was extented to you, when your friend shares with you a place that was deemed exclusive to her, and it was solely to be enjoyed by people whom she deem "worthy", ie good friends.

A good analogy of what is wrong with "spreading the love around" , would be like sharing a pie.

You eat the pie alone, you get 100% of the pie, but no one to accompany you.

You share the pie with your friend, you eat 50% of the pie, but you have someone to enjoy the goodness of the pie with you.

You share your pie with 3 other friends, you only get 25% of the pie, but you have a party.

Overcrowding happens when you eat only 5% or lesser of the pie.
Would that huge amount of sharing be considered enjoyable? No. 5% is less than a mouthful. That is when something is no longer enjoyable, and non exclusive.

It is afterall appropriate and polite to ask ie you receive an invite to a dinner party, if you want to bring a friend along, it is only right to inform the host about it. That is manners.
-
Selfish - For the lack of a better word to describe my perspectives towards the above scenarios.
I expect a certain amount of "respect" and confidentiality from my "exclusive" group that i share or extent personal benefits to.

Self admittedly, i am a snob.
A friend snob.

Not that i am conceited enough to say that my "pie" is great or anything, but i am a true believer of balance.

I would not eat the pie alone, because i am not greedy by nature.
However, I would not be dumb enough to share my pie with every pig, dog or cat that comes along, and end up not eating the pie.
Afterall, i am not running a charitable organization.

Rather, the pie would be properly shared, by my inner circle. This is what i call balance.

The price of my friendship?
Just simply respect how much i value exclusiveness and confidentiality in my life, and not attempt to "spread the love" around, because i value my balance in life very much.
Just because you had an insight to it, does not mean you have to broadcast them.

Just because they are your friends, doesnt necessary mean that they are mine.
Even if they are my friend, it does not necessary mean that they truly ARE my friends and i would fancy sharing anything with them.
In short, I am not benevolent.

Overcrowding upsets my balance, and it disses me off big time.
Except for sheer coincidence, i would not fancy seeing any uninvited friends in the same chill out place that i have discovered, or salon that i frequent, or just plain wearing the same piece of clothing as i am, and anything in equivolent, unless i say it is okay.

It is only appropriate and polite, because i am anal about appropriateness and extremely fussy about everyone being in their appropriate place - Da calls it hierarchical friendship. i.e, know where you stand and not overstep your boundaries.

I dont give a hoot about the people you deem as friends.
Just enjoy the generousity i extented, and learn how to contain the enthusiasm to share.

Thank you for your understanding.

sunnies. hair. exams

I took a picture with Eelyn's sunnies! They're cute! But i think they look cuter on her than me!
I think it's something that has got to do with the jawline and cheeks.
i've got fat and huge jawline, while Eelyn has nice jawlines that i'll die to have.

I sent Boo up to Blitz for a haircut the other day!
It's his first time being a guinea pig! (my attempts on converting him into a cheapo...haha)
We were caught in the rain after lunch, i insisted on cam whoring to pass time while waiting for the rain to lighten up alittle. Made silly faces as usual.

Went over to Reds for the hair demo that William and Gabriel conducted.
I had fun with the girls! From left to right : Jayne, Christina, Rachel and me.
I look huge and fat in this picture! so maybe it's time to lose some weight.
It's totally unflattering standing next to the 3 of them! Arghh!

As for the demo, i'll say that it was quite an experience. Just earlier in the day, William (one of the boss of Blitz), told me that i'm Blitz's longest model ever. Gahhh.. 4 whole years la. I take it as a compliment, and that speaks alot about my patience and my "cheapo-ness" too.
hee hee hee.

Hung out with the crew post Demo, they are a funny bunch. After knowing some of them for years, this is actually the first time i hung out with them. Haha. Too bad Kate wasn't there.

--
Was out mugging at Ridout Macs earlier.
I didnt accomplish what i sought to accomplish today.
Which is quite a feat actually.
I made a pact with Zoe. We were supposed to finish reading up 300 pages of our textbook.
alas! i've merely managed 100pages of Human Resource Management! Boo.

I went over to commonwealth for dinner with Zoe and Daniel, and I ended up with skinned elbows and knee when my attempted stunt failed.
Being lazy, i refused to make a detour. Deciding on hopping across a huge steep drain that separates the walkway and the concrete road. But Alas! the slippers that i was wearing wasn't meant for stunts. Whoops!
I slid, fell, and have skinned myself.
Thank god Daniel managed to grab me in time! Or i'd end up in a worst state.

Lesson learnt: Never attempt stunts in flip flops.

Boo.
It was fun while it lasted (2 seconds). Been a long time since i last tried stunts.
Makes me feel young again! Hahaha!
--
On a darker side, exams is approaching in a matter of days.
I hate the stupid that set the schedule.
25,27,30 April. and 9may.

I submitted Distribution Channel project on monday, and my first paper is on Wednesday.
Makes me wonder if that stupid had brains to think anot!
So much for compassion la.

I have to rush to study for 3 papers in a time span of 9 days!
Well done stupid. At the rate my face and health will be taking a toll!
I can so envisioning myself dying sprawled on the floor, from sheer exhaustion, or and overload of information

Disgusting stupid schedule.

Bah!

*Revolted face, and stomps off to bed*

Permed hair.

I reckon that taking pictures while travelling, would help to kill boredom, and shorten the stoning time involved.
Therefore, i camwhored my way to work on Sunday morning.
Life if pretty lonely withouth my zzZzzz sister to endure the bus ride along with me, not that she made much difference in conversation, seeing that she's snoozing 95% of the journey there. Haha. Oh well.
At least she's entertaining on the journey back home, where we cam whored our way back home.

In anycase, the pictures above, reflects the old hair cut.

Say helloo to the newly cut and permed hairdo.
Having my hair permed, is like a major hair milestone. After living on earth for 24 years, i've finally subjected the hair to a perming session, despite the horror stories that my mom lives to tell.

The only reason why i have decided to go ahead with the permed look, is due to the fact that Blitz needed girls for some coming Demonstration workshop of sorts for Reds Salon.
The after effect of sitting around for 3 whole hours?
An extremely crazy hair at the moment, but Gabriel and Willam assured me that the "bounce" would be less springy in a matter of day, and i sure hope so.

Somehow, the permed look didnt seem too surprising to me, after all, i've been fooling around with the curling iron that boo got for me, to create similar effects.
Only that this permed style is professionally done, while my temporary curls look only nice from the front, due to the limitation of the human limb.
I can't possibly twist my hands to angle my hairdo at the back nicely can i? Besides, my eyes are located in the front, not the back. Ahh well again.

The girls generally like the perm, while the guys claim that i've aged at least 10 years over an hour.
Ahhh who cares? As long as i like it, it is all that matters.
Besides, if you were to ask me, it's all about adjusting and getting used to the new hairstyle, nothing scary or life threatening.

Post hair washing observation: My hair looks somewhat like a cross between a Mehhh's shaven wool, and the poodle's hair. Boo. Gotta learn to start applying products on my hair.... and bye to the non combing/styling days of bed head.

Yawn..
On the otherhand, I've dedicated like 80% of my recent life to the Distribution Channel project, and have been hanging around in school like it's home.
I'm almost prepared to camp in school, if it wasn't for the fact that the escalator construction drilling is capable of driving me nuts!

I would really like to finish the project like soon, but i'm too lazy to start working on it. Ah hahaha.

We'll miss you, Snuffy, and scrawny pix!e

I received news of Snuffy's passing away earlier in the day. Naturally, i asked millions of questions, of which boo could answer none.
Despite suffering from cancer, and having gone through chemotheraphy, Snuffy seemed healthy and active when i last saw him on the third day of Chinese New Year, so i'm definitely shocked.

Snuffy was such an adorably little fella, even though he didn't' quite have fur or look the way his kind should look.

Though Snuffy does not belong to me or boo, he'll be greatly missed by Roy, Sheila and us. I didnt dare to message either of them, for fear of sparking waves of tears and sadness, so keeping silent seem the best to be for now.

Dealing with death is always tough. I cried many days when Murry was put to sleep. I miss my cat.

--
Just the other day, i brought Pix!e to the vet, at Mount Pleasant animal clinic.
Her skin problem seem to be worstening by the day. Yes, a balding guinea pig is always bad news.

Before bringing her to the vet, i read up alittle about her skin problem, but was unable to determine what she was suffering exactly. Was it Fungal, Mites and Lice, or Vitamin C deficiency? I could not locate any common guinea pig illness that was generated with keywords along: " fur problems", "guinea pig skin disease" and many more.

Boo and i spent hours sitting around waiting to consult the vet.
When we finally met the vet, we were told that her skin condition might not necessary be an exterior problem, but rather a reflection of internal problem.

Pix!e was then sent for a laboratory test, which involves skin scrapping.

I teared when i saw the fella using a sharp knife to scrap my little darling's bald spot at the thigh and neck area. A surgery KNIFE! =(

About an hour later, the test results did not detect any skin disease, and instead, i was told that the pig is likely to be diabetic. Which sort of explained for her increased intake of food, and yet still seem skinny/almost anorexic, frail outlook.

The nice vet lady prescribed Pix!e with vitamins, antibiotics, and skin cream, and we were told to be back in a weeks time for a review. Ahhhh, i hope pix!e's gonna be alright.

I came home to google "diabetic guinea pigs", and none of the case study or piggies showed symptons of balding. Puzzling. Definitely puzzling. Tsk tsk.

--

I'm currently "having fun" with a struggling piggie, who simply hates eating medicine.

Her reactions are definitely commendable.

1) It starts with her sniffing the air, detecting the smell of me preparing her mixture into a stringe. She promptly freezes, and resembled somewhat like a frozen piggie.

2) As i attempt to get her out of the cage, she darts to the corner of the cage. She squeals really loudly while darting from corner to corner. It takes quite an effort to get my hands on her, because she can be really fast, when she wants to, in life threatening situations, as like out nightly routine.

3) Securing my hands on her chin, to "shoot" the medicine into her mouth proves to be tough.

That little bald lady really knows how to put up with a fierce fight! She struggles pretty hard, for a frail and skinny little creature!

you'll never realise how tough it is to be feeding o.57cc of liquid to your little brat, until you actually try. I could not recall things being THIS bad, the last time she was discharged from the hospital. Ahhh.. i guess the piggie brat grew smarter?

Picture of my little piggie brat when she was much younger and fatter.
She looks scrawny and bald now. Will try to take recent picture of her when she's looking better.


When Scrabbles the bunny came, and fur was still intact, but noticeably scrawnier.

Well, i'll stick to my answer -> when boo asked if i'll still love her, even if she's bald and ugly.
My answer: Yes, i'll still love her no matter how she looks. It's unconditional love. =)

Anger Management

I'm not in much mood to blog lately, so heck the abrupt writings that i've adopted recently. In anycase, a fair bit of weird things that i have been doing lately.

Monday
There's my recent boycotting of school food to start with, where i literally starved myself, simply because i felt that the effects of eating lousy food would be worst than suffering gastric.

Dumb it may sound, but my food strikes stopped promptly when hunger was waaaayyy too much for me to withstand. The strike started on a friday, and ended on a monday. Lousy.

Wednesday
I spotted someone carrying a multicolored Coach bag in school. It's not that i fancy the bag, but rather, i detest the bag carrier. It got me started on a bout of bad memories that are best deleted permanently.

What can i say from this fast encounter? Bad bag taste + bad dress sense - come on, if you have chunky thighs like an elephant, quit wearing the mini skirts and worst, paired with a baby doll top. It just makes you look chunkier. Not cute or girlish, like you've imagined yourself to be.

Meeting you in person just reminded me that my facial features aren't the flattest in the world.

Definitely a repulsive 1 minute encounter.
I'm actually sorry that i've got this in built radar for people i detest.
My eyes are really sharp, when detecting eyesores, and yet they fail me, on an everyday basis.

Thursday
It's been a long while since i last felt angry enough to slap/punch anyone, where the process made my blood pressure rised threefolds. Yet the rest of the group seemed less reactive in comparison.
I reflected on what happened, and it occurred to me that i should continuously work on my anger management alittle, especially when i am dealing with difficult people.

Being "volatile" doesn't necessary seem to be a good thing, but it's definitely something that i've always been learning to curb, since young - fighting with male cousins, especially Derek, was a weekly event back in those days.

Mom usually have to sit me in a corner and try to tell me all about not being so explosive. Through the years, i've learnt to exercise restriants over minicule matters, but definitely need polishing up on the bigger matters, such as Thursday.
*

I've been sleeping alot more lately, and i'm still feeling tired.
Restless, tired, and distracted.

Friday
Nursing a huge bump on my head.
Still hurts, and it hurts bad enough for me to make monkey faces for a good 5 minute.
Boo! Rubbing hurts alot.
The bump was an accidental self affliction - i was checking out for vegs in the lower compartment of the fridge, and wham! I bumped my head when i stood up. That stopped me from wanting supper for a while. *pouts*

I settled for cup noodles when Boo stopped by Esso.

I'll load happy pictures up soon, when i'm feeling less lousy.

Sunnies and new house.

Taken in the morning

Taken at night.
See the difference in expression?


Da and i have been working in the morning, for the past 2 weeks.
It's tough i tell you. Waking up at 8, to get to work by 10am.
The hot weather, and harsh sunlight, gave us a horrible uneven tan.
I'm currently sporting unevenly brown shoulders, and horrible eye rings.

I'll leave for work looking extremely grumpy, while Da flopping over to sleep every chance she gets, and we'll travel =(
Sunnies happens to be a MUST HAVE, when we leave for work recently.

Took Zoe's sunnies to try, and i found myself looking alot like a blind girl , performing along the streets. I'm in the hunt for a nice squary looking sunnies, that doesnt look too square. Hahah dumb description, but sounds like i'm hard to please huh?
-
The boys came over to my place on Saturday, to accomplish Organization Theory project. There were 7 of us in total. It was such a sight, to see 7 Laptops placed side by side on my dining table - it was just too bad that we didnt take a picture.

I've finally submitted Organization Theory, and Human Resource Management project, where both happened to be due on the same day.. No doubt i was mentally and physically exhausted after i was done submitting the 2 projects.
Slept like a pig on Monday night...and went on sleeping over til Tuesday.
Life is considerably slacker for the time being, until Distribution Channel project beckons.
-

On the fun side,
Boo and i headed over to Ah Xue's place for a barbeque session over the weekends. The Strata, is conveniently located opposited United Square, Novena. Nice, but small estate. we then drooled over her new car - the Toyota MRS. New car, new home. I want that too!! Ahhhh this is the kind of life that i'll wanna lead, when i approach her age.I drooled alot over her sunken bath and rain shower.

The week before, Boo brought me over to Howie's place, which is also strategically located. The Nexus, along Bukit Timah Road, next to Maple Woods.

Suddenly, buying a place of your own seems to be the trend.
Therefore, it's time to work hard, save money and get myself a place of my own SOON!
hahaha...

Hair appointment and zouk beckons.
Will write more later.