I've survived a hectic school week,being more than glad to take a break from the entire ordeal. School term has barely began, and i am already drained not physically, but emotionally. It is probably wiser to leave out details, rather than a blatant broad cast on the events that happened.
As I always believe that things happens for a reason, and that humans rarely learn anything in joyous occasions, for it is only through trials and hardships suffered that moulds them into a "better" person.
I pondered on the aftermath of the week, where my actions and reactions, together with words exchanged, concluded that this is probably my time to hone up my interpersonal relationship skills. Admittedly, i have never been good with handling people, as it is far too tiresome to bother with pleasantries.
I have never been concerned about clinching the title of Miss popularity, or bother about being well liked, as i solely believe that nicecities are somewhat found in the nature of a person, and personally i've met really nice friends whom i love to bits and all. But for me, i doubt "nice" would be a word to describe me. It would almost be as good as saying, Daphne is as nice as a tiger can be.
It is probably unfortunate to admit that most friends, and even my mom, would tell me in various occasions that i exude intimidating presence that seriously scares almost everyone that has met me, an ostentatious facade i would say, with the remaining that claimed the urge to slap my face is unbearable, but it would be dumb, to be smiling at everything like a damn lunatic can you? It simply cannot be done.
To exchange pleasantries, is like a total waste of time, why do we have to do make do with dumb, random short conversations with random strangers - i have absolutely no idea.
I very much like indulging myself with my erratic tantrums, eccentric fancies, and plain day dreaming. However, being a contradictory realist i know this are perks that i have to deprive myself of, in my "attempt" to improve human relations.
Just writing all that made me realise how much i have pushed myself to conform to society's standards of social acceptance, despite my own set contradictory standards.
Seeking a balance between the two would definitely be a challenge.
Gone were the days of designer's whims and fancies, creative mood swings and plain individualist concept. It is funny that i was considered the more "normal" beings in the entire design school, while in business school, i feel alienated, highly disturbed in the competitive environment where no one is your true friend.
It's that creepy to me.
